"Fika" - a Swedish national pastime

Hello there ~ long time no see. ;-) Today I picked a half shady, half sunny, place for our picnic spot. Throw down your blanket (which, by the way, is not the same as throwing down your towel - hehe!), rest for a while, and allow your senses to fully take in your surroundings. 

My last post was written last night, when I was having myself a glass of Muscadet. I was posting it this morning, due to me trying to figure out the photo attachment thingy, but that is not when I was drinking my Muscadet. Just sayin'... ;-)

My father, "morfar" to my girls, called this morning. Morfar means maternal grandfather in Swedish. He got me thinking of "fika" today when he mentioned that he was sitting on his balcony and drinking his afternoon coffee and eating coffeecake (vetebröd in Swedish) in the sun with his wife. He was also looking forward to having "fika" with us later on in August, which is not surprisingly my girls' favorite thing to do with morfar when they are in Sweden. They do not get served coffee, however, on the balcony when they have "fika", but "saft och bullar" (saft is kind of like juice concentrate diluted with water and bullar are delicious Swedish sweet buns). When I told the kids that morfar was looking forward to fika with his little girls, they immediately gave loud cheers and wanted to fika right away. As I am unprepared for fika and have no fika stuffs in my house I suggested that we have a picnic fika (surprise!) in the park instead with cherries, carrots and cheese sandwiches, which is as far away from saft och bullar as you can come. (Carrots, mom. Really?) Poor kids... ;-)

"What is this fika you speak of?"

Well, it is a distinctly Scandi thing. I'd go so far as to say it is a distinctly Swedish thing. I am actually not sure if the Norwegians and the Danes do fika - or they do it, but don't have a name for it? You could translate it to "having coffee" with someone, but that doesn't quite do it. Yes, fika is a social activity and you often drink coffee during your fika, but yet it is something else as well. My older daughter suggested to compare it with English "afternoon tea time", and that is also an astute comparison as fika is a "thing" you do, an event, a way to slow down and enjoy yourself for a moment. But fika does not have the same ritualistic element as the English afternooon tea, and fika is not limited to a certain time of day. You can have morning fika and evening fika, and everything in between fika.

You can fika at home with friends, you can fika at a "konditori" (bakery, for lack of a better word), or a coffee shop. You can also have a fika picnic. People have "fika paus" or "fika rast" at their work. It's built in to the psyche of the Swede. It is a state of mind as well as an activity. Fika is when you take time out with friends or coworkers to enjoy a moment, before you go back in to the grind. And yes, it typically involves a whole lotta coffee, as Swedes drink an almost insane amount daily. They drink it like others drink water.

So we managed to have an midday fika picnic today (which lasted over two hours while the kids were also biking in the park), in preparation of the time we will have with morfar and our family when we go to Sweden. 

My neighbor Linda (also a transplanted Swede in Brooklyn) told me she wrote a paper on the topic of the Swedish fika in her anthropology class a few years back. I'd like to read that paper! 

Thanks for stopping by for a fika on my picnic spot today. It was nice to see you. Don't forget to take some time out and enjoy the moment, enjoy the day and the people around you.  

the fullmoon

Hello ~ I'm so delighted to see you again. Here, have a seat. Would you like a glass of nice, chilled Muscadet? If you are visiting for the first time - grab a blanket, join me here on this nice, shady spot and don't be shy.

My jetlag is normalizing. I said that last week too, and then look what happened...? Up at all hours. HA!

This blogging business is quite fun and I am enjoying it more than I dare admit. I am also so grateful for all of your encouraging messages. There is a feature here where I can see that my blog has had views from many parts of the world. How fun is that?!! So exciting!! 

I saw some photos today and was again reminiscing about the Hawai'i trip. One of the nights there we had the pleasure and the honor of being invited by our kumu to dance with our O'ahu halau sisters and brothers at an evening event at the Kahala Hilton. It was located right on the beach by Le'ahi, more commonly known as Diamond Head (that famous mountain silhouette often seen on images from Waikiki). It was a magical night. As the sun was setting we were lei-greeting all the guests at the event. Then as dusk fell, we had the honor of dancing accompanied by such superb musicians with the added accompaniment of the rolling waves on the ocean. As if this wasn't absolutely beatiferous enough, the fullmoon rose right behind us. It was simply stunning, and the photo here doesn't even do it justice. 


This was just a little memory snippet I wanted to share with you. Thanks for checking in, and I hope you enjoyed that Muscadet - it's quite refreshing. 

the picnic hour

Hi. Come on over and sit on my blanket for a while. I've found a nice spot under this shady, big tree. 

I love picnics. I love them. I just can't have enough of picnics during summer. My little one's birthday is in the summer, and apart from the fact that it's hard to have a party in the house and you want to take advantage of the fact that you can be out of doors and run the kids tired, it's also one of my favorite events: little one's birthday picnic. Yesterday me and my kids had a picnic with a friend and her child in the Botanic Garden. As the sun was setting behind the treetops, we chatted, ate and had some wine, while the kids ran in the sprinklers and got completely soaked and caught fireflies in the dusky twilight hour. Aaaaaaahhhhhhh...... heaven. 

It is my sincere hope that my kids will remember these moments more vividly than the crappy moments when either A) I am a bad mom and lose my patience with them, or B) they have to trudge through the mucky, yucky, sticky, wicky divorce stuffs that's been on their minds for 2 1/2 years. 

It is my wish that these types of playful memories will stir their little  hearts when they resurface in later years, that they too will go: "Aaaaaaaaahhhhh.... heaven", when they recall an evening, a sunset, a friend, a firefly, a sprinkler, a laughter.

I know that my current situation - the mucky, yucky, sticky, wicky divorce stuffs - is having an impact on them. I know it. I see it. I hear it. Their dad is in denial, I think. It seems to me he's in denial about a lot of stuff. Sometimes I try to talk about it, to relay the kids' feelings, but it seems he doesn't want to hear or maybe it just doesn't penetrate his sphere fully. I'm not sure which...? 

The kids are asked to deal with a lot of new stuffs. New half-siblings and a new potential "stepmom" and dad moving in with someone new - all in one go. None of it they asked for; all of it only to satisfy the adult players in this game. 

Sometimes they get angry with me and their dad. I get their verbal lashings, I experience their tempest. I hear their disappointments and their frustrations. I see their tears and their fears. I tell them "it's not your fault", "mommy and daddy still love you so much". I tell them "mommy and daddy will never go away from you, we will always be yours". But they scream, they cry, they tell me how they really feel and believe me, they don't mince words! While tears stream down their little cheeks and darkness gathers in their eyes, they tell me of their fears: "You and daddy are never going to be together again". It breaks my heart to know that they have experienced so much heartbreak in their young years, but all I can do is snuggle up real close to their little beings, nod my head and say "yes, you're right sweetness" while I add quietly in my head "mommy and daddy don't want to be together ever again, and mommy has to exercise a whole lotta patience right now to remain friends with your father". 

I love picnics. Right now they represent an oasis of calm in big city living, a respite from stress, and hope that good memories will stay in my children's hearts and win over the bad memories. Picnics are my slice of heaven... Pizza too actually... oh, and standing in the fridge door with an open jar of Kimchi... and come to think of it, a shower at the end of a sweaty day is pretty heavenly. (But I couldn't make this blog space into a pretend shower - that would be weird, and people might get the wrong idea.)   :)

This was fun and I'm glad you popped on over. Thank you for the visit. Come back again and don't forget your picnic basket and if you happen to have a set of speakers with birdsong bring those too. 

the jetlag hour

Hello ~

Nice to meet you. Spread your blanket, and quickly pour yourself a glass of something special (I suggest wine) and make yourself comfortable. If you forgot your blanket, I will share.

Since jetlag still is holding me firmly with it's large talons and I cannot for my life go to sleep, I figure I might as well start this write-a-blog business. I might as well run this pig. Now! :)

It's been a week since we got back home after an awesome two weeks in Hawai'i. Since homecoming though, I've been fighting jetlag - the kids won't fall asleep until 3.30am and other such antics - for days. And the topper was that the worst heatwave in years pretty much was in full force as we landed back in New York. It got up to 108 Fahrenheit one day in Newark, NJ, last week, which is not were we live but I thought I'd mention it anyway since that is oh-so HOT! 

If you're not familiar with what 108 degrees Fahrenheit really means - yes, I am talking to you my Scandi sisters and brothers - it can be translated to over 42 degrees Celcius. With the thick humidity it feels like 115 F = over 46 C. That's brutal.

But enough about the weather. Me and my hula sisters in our New York halau (school) extension of Pua Ali'i 'Ilima O'ahu went to Hawai'i - 10 crazy hula sisters in all. It was hula immersion galore lead by our amazing kumu Vicky Holt Takamine, who had classes and workshops and performances and huaka'i's (excusions) planned (or not planned, but happened anyway in true Takamine fashion!) for us in a never ending stream. For some of us it was the first time we got to meet our hula sisters and brothers on O'ahu finally. It was AAWSUM!   

You can read about our arrival here:

http://www.paifoundation.org/2011/07/06/ny-students-hit-hawaii-this-week/

One of our events was an early morning TV appearance with our kumu and some of our halau members from Hawai'i and New York. You can enjoy that here:

http://www.hawaiinewsnow.com/category/6743/video?clipId=6047344&topVideoCatNo=undefined&autoStart=true

The culmination of all our efforts, hard work and endless hours of practice back in New York was our participation together with our O'ahu halau in the prestigious Prince Lot Hula Festival in the beautiful Moanalua Gardens in Honolulu. What a day! I will live on the surge I felt after it was all done, for the rest of the year. That feeling will feed me at dull moments, during hard times or when I stress about something silly.

Some of the images from the whole event were professionally captured here:

http://www.moanaluagardensfoundation.org/

Well, this was nice but my eyelids are getting rather heavy, and I am going to attempt to sleep. We have to do this again sometime soon. Don't forget to bring your picnic basket, and some paint to paint the sky and the flowers.